Landmine

Posted: February 21, 2018 in Friday Fictioneers
Tags: , , ,

After staring at this picture for awhile a story finally came to mind. Sorry, it turned a bit bleak in the end. As always, thanks to Rochelle Wisoff-Fields for hosting our Friday Fictioneers’ party each week, and thanks to my fellow attnedees for reading and leaving comments.

Photo by Marie Gail Stratford

Just like the yarn in Grandma’s weaving basket, the threads of Lilliana’s life were all tangled up.
Used to be she knew precisely where she was headed and what waited at the end.
Used to be nothing, nothing could get in her way.
Yeah, used to be.
But now she couldn’t see beyond the thin, grey line of her new life.
Sure, people tried to help, said reassuring words, promised the moon.
She listened, straight-backed and graceful.
Even smiled – sometimes.
But Lilliana knew, absolutely, that women without feet were never asked to join the ballet.

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Comments
  1. Those kinds of experiences are always seemingly impossible to bear. I hope she learns to deal with her broken dream. Unfortunately it happens quite often too.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. k rawson says:

    Oh such an ache in this. On the second read, I got to savor all your judicious word choices. Beautifully done.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. neilmacdon says:

    that’s tragic if she’s really lost her feet, but clever if that’s a metaphor. Perhaps she’s just learning where her threads can lead

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Lynn Love says:

    Such a painful life, well told. That last line is absolutely heart breaking. Well done Lish

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Anita says:

    Sad story.
    Unfortunate reality for many…
    May Lord bless us all.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Iain Kelly says:

    I missed the title on first reading, a shocking ending.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Dear Lish,

    You went straight for the jugular with this one, but did it so well.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Moon says:

    I think Liliana is a very strong woman. She has a broken dream and a broken heart right now and is even bearing the natural and artificial pity patiently but I am definite she will soon dream a new dream, one that she can realise in this life, despite the odds.
    Wonderfully written story. I really liked the way you constructed the second and third sentence with’ used to be…’

    Liked by 2 people

  9. draliman says:

    I actually read the last line as a metaphor for lacking the thing which would make your dream reality, but great either way!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. granonine says:

    Beautifully written, even the sad ending. Life does happen.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Joy Pixley says:

    Oh my, that really did turn dark in the end! Lovely bit of writing.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. yarnspinnerr says:

    OMG. That is a dark but fabulous take.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Dale says:

    Beautifully sad tale. My hope for her is this: She will get out of her funk and find a purpose. She sounds like she had too much gumption to just waste away…

    Liked by 1 person

  14. plaridel says:

    all’s not lost. those who can’t dance came becoming critics.

    Like

  15. pennygadd51 says:

    “She listened, straight-backed and graceful.” This is the key sentence. She’s straight-backed and graceful through years and years of tough disciplined training to realise her dream as a ballerina. All of that has been stolen from her.
    That’s really good, clever writing, Alicia.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Awwe, that’s so sad.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I have faith that she will achieve greatness another way.
    Beautifully touching story, Alicia.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Laurie Bell says:

    Gosh this is well told. Such terrible terrible things land mines

    Liked by 1 person

  19. That last line is so effective and so heart-breaking. You get a real feel for her tenacity ‘straight-backed and graceful’, and I hope that she is strong enough to find a new love in life. Beautifully written.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. After reading the last line i realized that it was all in the title… so many dreams crushed… the scars of the wars stretch over generations.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. rgayer55 says:

    Now, what to do with those 300 pairs of shoes in the closet?

    Liked by 1 person

  22. James McEwan says:

    A hard punching truth.

    Like

  23. subroto says:

    Beauttifully done, such a quirky last line and yet it pulls you right in.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Sarah Ann says:

    Love the images of tangled yarn. This is so sad, and you lead us so well to that crushing end.

    Liked by 1 person

  25. ahtdoucette says:

    Such a powerful last line that gives meaning to the whole piece. It’s so true that sometimes there are real problems that can’t just be ignored or untangled. Not sure if it was literal (no feet) or figurative, but regardless a powerful point well painted.

    Like

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