Wednesday/Friday is here again. Thanks, Rochelle, for posting such a pretty picture provided by Priya Bajpal. My stab at writing a 100-word story follows.
They suggested Anya write wishes on paper and put them in a jar
saying this small action would provide hope.
Selecting the color and texture of the paper
was more difficult than knowing her wishes.
Food. Water. Freedom from pain.
Small comforts. Clean sheets. Crisp gowns.
Every day Anya slipped a wish into her crystalline jar
then nestled a polished shell on top
because Father told her shells carried
luck within their curls and swales.
Skeleton thin, and calling
for water, water, water,
Mother died writhing in pain.
Anya dropped a match in the center of her wishes.
Dark, but compelling, Alicia
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Thanks, Neil. This is pretty much what happened to my mom when she died. Broke my heart, day-by-day.
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Dear Lish, I’m so sorry you and your mom went through such an ordeal.
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Thank you, Penny. It was a long three months. Thank goodness my sisters were with me. We made an excellent tag-team taking care of both her and my father.
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Loved this one
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Thank you, Josh. I always like it when you stop by. Lish
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Powerfully done!
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
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Thanks, Susan.
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You’ve written a dark and powerful story, Lish. Suffering and death kill illusions very quickly.
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They truly do and one can’t explain everything after all is said and done. As my sisters and I said while our Mom lay dying, “What happens on Alcott Street, stays on Alcott Street.” Much love, tears, anger, and support.
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If we know love then we know pain. A powerful piece of writing.
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Isn’t that the truth? Thanks, Michael.
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It’s enough to make you think that wishes are only for those who already have.
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Oh, I hadn’t thought of that! Thanks, Alice.
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🙂
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There aren’t many who have a good death, I’m afraid. And along the way there are always those hopes and fears to punctuate the journey to its inevitable end. Sensitively crafted, Alicia.
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We can all start out hoping to die peacefully in our sleep and go from there. Thanks, Sandra
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Too bad mother died a painful death. Anya’s wishes did not come through. No wonder she burnt them.
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A lot of wishes don’t come true so it’s extra special when one does, right? Thanks for reading and commenting.
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Dark deep and different. Excellent!
Click to read my FriFic tale!
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Thanks, Keith! I truly had planned on going on the light side. Sometimes the muse drags us in the other direction.
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I know that feeling!
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Dear Lish,
Powerful story. I’m sorry it’s based on your own experience. Hugs.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ah, thanks. As you know, this happened the summer I disappeared from the Friday Fictioneers clan.
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Very grim with an even darker ending – the loss of hope,
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Or steering it in another direction. Hope should never be lost. Thanks for stopping by, Ali.
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I was so sad reading this story, and even sadder to read your comments about your mum. Sending hugs X
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Thanks, Louise. Maybe I should have kept that bit to myself. It’s just that she and Dad have been on my mind lately. Hugs received.
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A very powerful portrayal. So sorry to hear it is based on your own experience. x
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Thanks, Clare. Have you been missing from FF lately? I was glad to read your story the other day.
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Thanks, Alicia. I have been missing from FF for a while. I try to make an appearance when I know I will have time to comment on other people’s stories, but my Mum, who lived 100+ miles away was unwell from June last year and I had to keep going at weekends to help her. Sadly, she passed away at the end of November, but she was 87 so not unexpected. Nice to know I was missed! 🙂
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So sorry about your mom! You are a good daughter. I’m sure she knew that. Hugs.
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Thank you. I’m sure your mum did too. ❤
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I’m so sorry, Alicia, of the sadness you endured at the loss of your mom. Your story is powerful and insightful to the pain and disillusionment one feels after facing loss and suffering.
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I know not everyone has/had a good mom so might not feel the way I did at her death, but she was an angel, truly. Thank you.
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Wow. That was (sadly) beautiful.
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Thank you!
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How very sad, good stuff
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Next week I’ll try to write a funny story, although I’m not very good at that. Thanks.
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dang, it wasn’t the outcome i’d expect it to be.
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Life! Dang those twists and turns. Thanks so much for reading and commenting.
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Beautifully done, Alicia. We can feel your emotions in this one, of course, as it is based on reality…
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Thanks, Dale!
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Very powerful. I’m sorry to hear it comes from such a raw place. Very beautifully told.
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Ah, thanks. 🙂
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As a member of the astute group known as “They” I would like to say that the suggestion was healthy. Too bad her hopes and dreams were held captive under such a sad and disfunctional conditions.
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I would like to think that the suggestion was very healthy (it’s a made-up part of the story as you probably know, gotta’ work the seashells in.) Dying ain’t pretty. Let’s make a pact to ‘go’ while dreaming sweet dreams.
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A very touching story.
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Thank you.
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Dark, powerful and compelling reading. Very well done.
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Thanks so much for stopping by and leaving a lovely comment.
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It’s hard to get the balance between facing reality and maintaining hope. Your story of the wishing jar and shells showed the difficulty beautifully. I hope Anya can regain her optimism in time. Beautifully told story.
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Thank you. I believe optimism always wins out. It just takes time.
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That;s heartbreaking Lish. And the worst of it is the loss of hope amid the horror. Beautifully and sympathetically written
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Thanks, Lynn. Glad you stopped by and commented. Have a good day.
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My pleasure Lish
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That was perfection. What a sad tale….
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What a lovely thing to say. Thank you.
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Heartbreaking little poem/story.
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Thanks, Liz
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I love the way you took us step by step through hope to despair; once the grieving is done, perhaps Anya will regain hope.
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Thank you so much. I believe “Hope springs eternal” it just gets a little lost at times.
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I feel like a parrot, echoing what others said about your powerful story and the death of your mum. Rituals may ease the mind for a bit, but they seldom help.
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Parrot away, my friend. Thank you for stopping by. Lish
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Oh dark, but wow such great tension in this one
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Thanks!
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Heartbreaking!
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Sorry! 😦
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That’s very sad, an awful way to go, sorry to hear you and your mum had to go through it Alicia
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Thanks, Michael. Rough times, but I came out of them a better person. I think.
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Beautifully written, Alicia.
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Thanks, Sascha.
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