Shaktiki Sharma provided this thought-provoking picture for this week’s 100 word Friday Fictioneer prompt. And, as always, Rochelle Wisoff-Fields posted it for our merry band. Thanks to you both.
Mind whirring, Shamar jangled two quarters,
bus money Mama handed him saying,
“Don’t come back ’til 3:00. Need me some time.”
“I’m a man now,” Shamar thought, stepping aboard the bus
from N.Y. to Chicago.
“She won’t never see me again.”
“5:00! Where is that child?”
Tanisha asked the current man in her life.
He shrugged.
Balloons hung everywhere.
A HAPPY BIRTHDAY banner snapped on the lawn.
Tanisha drifted to Shamar’s room
doing the same thing,
hoping for a different result.
And for the first time, she saw the note.
“Take this $100 and get the hell out.
Your mama don’t need you no more.”
(102 words)
Dear Alicia,
Obviously the man in Tanisha’s life isn’t worth the paper he wrote the note on. I hope Shamar will find his way. Gritty, heartbreaking story.
Shalom
Rochelle
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Thanks, Rochelle. I guess I’m done with feel-good stories. The fellow standing on the curb seemed so desolate. I always appreciate your stopping by. Alicia (Oh! and Happy New Year!)
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Poor Shamar. I guess he’ll make his way home again. A hundred doesn’t go far
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Poor little fellow is in for a big surprise, I suspect. Thanks for reading and leaving a comment. Happy New Year! See you on the flip side.
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I do hope Tanisha finds him – poor boy. Great story.
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Me too. Thanks for reading and commenting Dahlia. I always appreciate it. A good New Year to you and yours.
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Happy New Year to you all too 🙂
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That kind of hit me hard. Well done, Alicia.
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Oh, sorry, Sandra. The fellow at the side of the road looks more than sad to me. Happy New Year. Stop by for some champagne! Alicia
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I hope Tanasha learns to find herself alone… maybe one day her son will be back.
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Me, too! Thanks, Bjorn. Happy New Year to you and yours.
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Wow, you need to publish these…find other pictures to match since there might be the copyright issue…your writing is fantastic!
Sent from Yahoo Mail on Android
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Thanks, Rea Ann. You made my day. Love you, Lish
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Well he’s a truly nasty piece of work, I hope she’s strong enough to get rid of him and find her son and apologise/explain.
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Thank you, Michael. I have a feeling she will. Glad you came by to cheer her on. Happy New Year. Alicia
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Shamar almost sounds younger than his 13 years from his voice and that’s really scary for his prospects in the big city. He’ll be so vulnerable there alone, bless him. This is so sad, so real. Let’s hope he can be saved. Great story Alicia
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A good observation, Lynn. I hadn’t seen it that way. Thanks for reading and leaving such a thoughtful comment. Happy New Year.
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My pleasure – always enjoy reading your stories. Happy New Year to you too 🙂
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Wow, that packed a punch! Hope she kicks the current man out and finds her son.
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You and me both, Clare. Thanks for reading. Hope you and yours have a Happy New Year. Alicia
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It sounds like out of all the “wrong” men mum’s been dating, this one’s the “wrongest”. Imagine her horror at finding that note,
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I actually did. I’ve never had children, but I could imagine her heart dropping to her feet then turning on the current man like a wolverine. Thanks for always stopping by. Happy New Year!
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Wow! The current man will soon be the man of ancient history unless I miss my guess.
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Nope, I think you’re spot on. Thanks for wondering. Happy New Year Joseph.
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Oh that stung awfully bad! I’m hoping Mama is smart enough to get rid of that awful man in her life… oh the damage he has caused and sadly, the boy believed…
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I think we believe a lot of things we shouldn’t – especially when we’re thirteen. I think the mama bear in Tanisha will come out. Thanks so very much for reading and commenting. I hope all is well with you. Happy New Year.
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Right back at Alicia!
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Ouch! Some kids have all the luck, don’t they?
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Yes, some are luckier than others, that’s for sure. Thanks for reading.
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That old theme of “ain’t never gonna come back” is always a good one. It’s more complicated (naturally) than what it appears to be. And, I’m sure someone’s going to get the comeuppance.
Very descriptive without being obvious, very entertaining. Super work, Alicia. I like the poetic-type format.
Five out of five “By The Time I Get To Phoenixes.” 😀
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I’d forgotten about that song! Now it’s going to spin in my mind all night! Thank you? I at least want to thank you for reading and commenting. Happy New Year!
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I’m unfortunately a carrier of Jingle Virus (when commercials get into the brain). Best way to knock it out is with a catchier song. See Al Jolson’s I Love To Sing-a.
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That man sure is a bad man. Even if Shamar’s mama finds him, it will be hard to convince him to return as he won’t be able to un-remember that note. I love the authenticity of the characters’ “voices”. It takes one right inside their heads, plus it gives such a forward momentum and rhythm to your writing.
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Thanks so much for your kind words. Happy New Year, Sarah. “See” you next week.
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Happy New Year to you, too, Alicia 🙂
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Great sting in the tail of this story, Alicia. Poor Shamar
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Thanks for reading. Hope you have a wonderful new year.
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This one really shook me, Lish. Such a sad but often true story, for so many kids. Such a sad misunderstanding! Great seeing you recently… not sure why it’s so hard, when we connect weekly, here. 😉 Happy New Year!
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Happy New Year to you too. Thanks for reading. Are you still “away?”
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Yes, until the end of January! Really just starting… Tel Aviv tomorrow. 🙂
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Shoot! Mind like a sieve. I remember you told me that. Have fun, stay safe and bring back wonderful memories!
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OMG…you got me right in the mamma feels
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Sorry…. Happy New Year!
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